For years now I have been endeavouring to in still the message of selflessness, however, he is sixteen, a boy and I feel the message has been lost on him. These days our conversations revolve around what he wants...."can you buy me this can you take me here" and what sucks. Cleaning his room sucks, bringing in the washing for me, sucks, having a shower, taking out the rubbish and walking the dog...all suck. Needless to say I had all but given up on his ever seeing outside of himself.
Two events have changed everything.
First a car accident. Thankfully we were not involved but it did happen right in front of us. I didn't see it at first as it was across the road from where were driving, but Cooper did. "Mum!!" he screamed, "pull over pull over, someone just crashed!" I diabolically veered onto a medium strip and before I could stop him he was out of the car and bolting across four lanes of moving traffic. Not one for being aware of much around him I held my breath while dialling 000, praying he would A: make it safely across and B: not be confronted with something that could possibly scar him for life.
By the time I had arrived with the Ambulance team on the line, Cooper, with the help of other witnesses to the crash, had crawled into one of the smashed cars to retrieve the young drivers handbag, checked on the other motorist and was helping to roll one of damaged vehicles from the intersection. He didn't even have shoes on! Later I asked him what he thought he was doing jumping out of our almost moving car, and perilously charging through the traffic. As a mother I was mortified. He simply said "Mum, if someone needs help, I'm there"
The second event occurred yesterday.
I was expecting him home from school and he was late. From our verandah I can see down our street. I wandered out to see if I could see him walking up the hill. There he was talking to two of our elderly neighbours. I then saw him driving old Norm's electric scooter into their garage. How strange.
When he arrived home he said his hellos, dumped his bag on the floor (grrrr) poured himself a drink and then went straight into his room to be lost to the world of YouTube videos. At dinner I mentioned that I had seen him with the neighbours. "Oh yeah......" he said casually "As I was walking up the street, I saw old Norm try to ride up his driveway and then he fell off his scooter." "Oh my God!", I exclaimed "what did you do?" "What do ya reckon, Mum? I ran as fast as I could up the street...I helped him up, made sure he was OK, ran to get his wife and then I put his scooter away and helped them inside." he said this so casually like it happened everyday. "So lucky I was late, talking to my mate down the road, otherwise maybe no-one would have seen him."
He wasn't even going to mention it.
Selflessness...lesson learnt.
I call this unconditional giving. Unconditional "Giving", when practiced subconsciously has been installed by your parents and peers. At a young age, that is what happens. Later on - we can practice this consciously. Cooper is lucky to have you two as parents.
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