I am a student yet. Still. Yoga is my teacher.
I feel that I am getting it. I have achieved and I am good.
Then Yoga shows me my ego. Bam! I am shown the truth. I struggle, this is hard.
Really really, hard.
I am uncomfortable. Challenged. I don’t like it. It doesn’t feel
good. Yoga sees and knows, EVERYTHING.
I can be humble and just be with where I am until I am able
to move on, or I can berate myself, feel lacking in some way, angry with myself
for some sort of failure.
What to do? Which will I choose?
I react in a very familiar way, I feel it coming…the
tantrum. On the outside I am composed, on the inside, full scale dummy-spit…spade
and bucket thrown…I storm from the sandpit. I’m not playing anymore!
Sound familiar? We don’t like to be uncomfortable. We like
smooth sailing, calm seas, a bridge over troubled waters and why not, it’s nice.
Right?
There are plenty who would argue that life is meant to be
easy and we do not need to struggle and to a point, I agree. However, when we
run from uncomfortable situations that arise naturally, we often miss the opportunity
to find deeper peace.
What would happen if we felt truly uncomfortable and just
didn’t judge it? Just let it be for the moment. Ok I feel terrible…now what? What
if it is OK? Without the story we give it, is it really that bad?
I am not incapable, I am uncomfortable. I am not worthless,
I am uncomfortable, I have not failed or am doomed to do so, I am merely out of
my comfort zone. So what? Wait and see what happens next.
No story…no tantrum. It is not feeling uncomfortable that is
scary, it is the rattle-tattle tongue waging inner ego dialogue which
devastates. The yarn. The myth. It’s all nonsense and completely made up. We
created it whenever we did, for whatever reason.
Hit backspace. Erase. It’s your story.
Feeling challenged is necessary and unavoidable. However, embellishing
that uncomfortable feeling with nonsensical jargon is a choice.
Next time you feel truly challenged, check your inner
dialogue. Can it be trusted or is it just an old made up story from once upon a
time…
Comments
Post a Comment